The New Teachers

As we all know, today technology controls every single part in our lives. It organizes our documents, saves our money and even makes us a cup of coffee.Some believe that technology can even educates our kids at school.Is technology going to replace the human teacher?

I believe not. First of all, computers do not have the human feelings, which are very important at school, when educating kids. A human teacher shows happiness,anger and even excitement while teaching children. A Teacher teachs his students how to become good people. How can it work without feelings? Today, study(gr. - use the plural form) shows(gr.) that computers can not provide with any kind of emotion.

Second, I do not think that computers are the best model for children, especially for young kids. Young kids at school consider their teacher as a role model, the person they want to be. I think that computers are not the best model for them. Reaserch in the U.S. shows that kids bwtween the ages of to 11 are affected by their teacher by 45%. These findings tell us that we must not use computers instead of teachers.

To sum up, I am really concerned about this assessment, computers can not change the real humans. We have to keep the situation as it is, our kids must grow up with a human teacher. Technology is useful, it makes our life(gr. - use the plural form) easier but it can not shake us off(ww.) from the responsability for our kids.

(75)
Daphna

Technologic Invasion

The internet, like other technologic inventions, came into our lives at the late 20th century and become more and more popular. Because of it's accessibility and simplicity internet is one of the most useful technology today.

On the one hand,the internet is such a great, useful thing. People use the internet for business, fun, studies and even for shopping. This way there is much more spare time for other tasks and hobbies. The internet makes our lives easier.(This is good and so correct, but too general)

On the other hands, the internet has some negative effects as well. Today, most of the children are addicted to the computer, one of the reasons is surfing the internet. Young kids are able to get into any chat room and talk to people they should not talk to. In addition, the internet prevent(ww.+gr.) physical activity and harms our health.

To sum up, I think that internet is great and necessary, while it does not change our lives too much.(What do you mean?). we should not be the " internet slaves(phr.)" but using(gr.) if(ww.) to help us.

(68)
Daphna

Young Drivers

Car accidents are some of the most dangerous and deadly accidents(ww.) in the whole world, that kill many people every year. Some people believe that young drivers are involved at(ww. - in) too many accident(s), and the age of (obtaining a) driver's license should be raised to 19.

I believe that it is (a) good idea, young drivers cause too many accidents because of their lack of experience and childish attitude. For example, two years ago young drivers made(ww.) a" street race" in a city(ww.) at night, one of them hit a small child and killed him. Experts believe that if the driver drove 10 k/h less, as the law requires, the child could be alive.

In addition, to help the youths moving between places(phr.+gr.), I think there should be a new system of "taxis" that is cheaper from the regular taxi, just for youths over the age of 19. In that way, there will be less drivers (on the roads) and less accidents.

To sum up, I think that in our sociaty the limit of a drive(phr.) license should be 19. Young drivers are not mature enough to drive by themselves.

(80)
Daphna

Bagrut Exams

Some people believe that the Bagrut exams are the most reliable way of testing the students' knowledge. I think this is right and the best way so far to know how good the students are.

First of all, the Bagrut exams provide the knowledge of the student's abilities in "real time ".Every student has his own test, but same question as the other students. This way the grades can be more accurate about the student's knowledge. For example; researches from the U.S show that final exams are the best accurate way testing the students' knowledge.

Second, Bagrut exams test all students in every high school in the same time, and asking the same questions.

The questions all over the country are the same, so there is no " gap knowledge " between people which born at the same year but not at the same city at Israel(phr. - not clear).

To sum up, I believe that the Bagrut exams are the best way of testing students so far, and until there is a better way to know about our knowledge the education system should keep it as it is.

(55)

Daphna

Kind of Sports

Sport is a very large "issue" divided to two main categories: Team sports and individual sports. Team sport(s) combine the strategy from the whole team(phr.) while individual spots focus on self ability(ww.). They are both popular all over the world, (however,) I think team sports is better.

First of all, team sports is a(מיותר) much more complicated then(sp.) individual sports ; the players work as a team, win as a team. They use the fact of being(phr.) in a group and have better score(s), which is one of the advantages of playing in a team.

In addition, playing in a team is much more attractive than individual sport(s).In my opinion, watching a group of people winning together making(gr.) the fans much more exiting(ww.). I think that this is the main reason why team sports are more popular than individual sports. For example, football and basketball games have more fans than a marathon race.

To sum up, team sports and individual sports sometimes seem similar, but they are totaly different. I believe that the exitement of the team sports attract people more then(sp.) individual sport(s).

You are still not explaining clearly. You have to rephrase some of your sentences.
(70)
Daphna

12 Ben-Zvi street
19/4/10
Holon


"See the World" Travel Agency
10 Guild street
New York

Dear Sir/Madam ,

I am a 16 years old guy from Israel, and I would like to use your company's service to see New York city. My special interests include sight seeing and sport games.

As I said before, I like sport games and unique places. For example, I would like to see the museum of natural history or The metropolitan museum of modern art . In addition, I would like to see some sports like american football games.

Even though these attractions look amazing, I must consider the cost of this trip. How much money cost each night at the hotel?(phr.) Does the hotel provide meals? In how much time I can visit at whole or most of the attractions(phr.) I mentioned before?

In conclusion, I hope to hear from your company as soon as possible, so I can start planning my trip

Sincerely yours,

Jay Green

(78)
Daphna

13 Hoffyen street
Holon
April 8th 2010

Station Manager
Reshet Bet
19 Muta-Gur street
Tel Aviv

Dear Sir\ Madam,

I am an 11th (grade) studet in Kugel high shchool. I have heard about your wish to produce a new radio show for teenagers and I would like to present you my opinion(ww. - idea) for the new show.

I suggest that you should(מיותר) start a new show talking about driving among teenagers. Most of the new drivers are teenagers with a low confidence or teens with too high self confidence, which cause(gr. - causes) them to drive too fast and unsafety(ww. - unsafely). The new program will include tips for drivers from other teenagers and current events around the country conacted(sp.) to unsafety(ww.) drivers.

I believe that the show will be a huge success. I think that new drivers will feel better to talk about their problems with other teenagers than their parents or other adults. In addition, the show may teach unsafety(ww.) drivers to drive "by the book". This subject is relevent because I think the comunity is not aware enough for(ww. - of) teenagers' driving problems. the show will be devided into 2 parts, for each of the main problem.

To sum up, I hope that you take it into conciderations(מיותר), and the new show will help the teenagers to drive better at(ww. - on the) roads.

Sincerely yours,

Jecky Brown
(80)
Daphna